Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Hello World

I have gone quite a lengthy amount of time here with no post. I simply haven't had the inspiration lately.  I find myself at work being a slave to the countless e-mails I get each day and long droning phone calls from whiners for 8 hours, that I swear I hear them in my sleep at night. I guess that's why I have a job though, is to WORK, so I can't complain, but that's why I haven't been posting.  I've often thought about how nice it would be to sit at home all day and play video games, but honestly, I'd be so bored. On those particular weekends when there isn't much going on, I find myself wanting to aimlessly spend money, or bake fattening cookies to discourage my weight loss plan.  That's still going good I guess. I'm still at my 27 pound plateau though which is really bothering me. I still work out. I've been trying to switch up my normal cardio and light weight routine, into more heavy lifting and Pilate's exercises. The places I want to lose the most weight are my lower abs (what woman doesn't?), and my arms. We are going to Florida on April 2nd for a week and haven't looked good in a bathing suit in 5 years. How I long to step outside in a bikini with confidence instead of wishing I could shrivel into a tiny raisin and dissapear. I definitely look better then I did last summer. My waist has shrunk significantly, but I still have a month and a half to shrink my beer gut more, so I'm ready. Once I take some pictures in Florida, I'll post a few maybe. We'll see how they turn out.

I've taken on a new obbsession with spray tanning lately. In my personal opinion, it's definitely a better alternative to tanning in a bed.  It's more expensive, but I think it's more beneficial. It takes up less time, is obviously better for your skin, and looks natural without all the burning and radiation.  A new spa and salon opened up 2 blocks from my house and they offer the spray tanning services.  You tell them which shade you would like (light, medium, dark) and they put the cartridge inside the booth. Once the booth has warmed up, you step inside in your birthday suit.  There are numbers on the floor of the booth, and the booth's woman voice will tell you when you need to rotate, and where to put your feet. I will admit, I felt pretty silly the first time I I was being taught how to dance by a robot voice in a booth while I got sprayed from head to toe with a brown mist that smelled like Chinese food....but you're only in the booth a total of 3 minutes so it's overwith before you know it.  Once you get past the mild humiliation, it's actually pretty relaxing. Surprisingly, it really does look natural too. It doesn't streak and is not orangy at all. It usually rubs off after 3-4 days, which is the only downside, but I still like it. You can't really beat $60 a month for unlimited sprays considering it's $25 bucks a session normally. I go probably 3 times a week, so you can do the math there.

So, I was at Wal-mart over the past weekend, the day before Valentines day, and you'd think it was Christmas. I was trying to buy groceries and people were running into me, pratically mowing me over to get to the Baked was going on here? Come to think of it, I was actually in Wal-mart around Christmas time and it wasn't even as bad.  People were practically falling over each other in the 'featured aisle' section trying to get heart shaped boxes of chocolates and cheap stuffed bears. You know, the 4 seasonal aisles that are usually conveniently placed right in front of the entrance? I decided I would take a gander, because I wanted to get Ben one of those little hand held back massagers that look like spaceships. I walked down one aisle and there was a Mexican family of 9 hanging out in he middle of the aisle. The parents were standing staring off into space awkwardly while their 7 kids or whatever ran about the aisle, poking and slapping things.  I quickly backed the cart out of that mess and tried the next one. There were two woman standing there, and a pole with a phone on it.  On the right of the pole it was clear, but too small for my cart to fit. On the left side of the pole, was the two women who acted like I wasn't there and giggled to each other about something. I waited patiently, finally said excuse me, and they continued to ignore me. Why are people so rude? Get the fuck out of the way! Had I been anymore pissed off then I was at the current time, I probably would have pushed my way through, but at this point, I was relatively calm since I had just gotten there, and just sighed loudly and left the aisle.

Later, I was done with the grocery portion of my shopping and decided I would look for the massager again. I saw a group of Wal-mart creatures standing in the middle of the walking path, chatting loudly, so I walked up and waited for an opportunity to interrupt. I was starting to get the feeling that I was invisible because the idiots just stood there and continued talking even though I was standing there staring at them.  Finally I said loudly, "DO YOU GUYS CARRY THOSE LITTLE VIBRATING BACK MASSAGERS?' One of the woman said, "Probably in pharmacy--So anyway..." She continued talking to her friend/co-worker.  As I walked away I said, "Thanks I guess and excuse me for interrupting your conversation!" Bitches. I felt like I was in one of those videos that they make new employees watch..."...And this is how you NEVER treat a guest here at Wal-Mart!' Cut to the scene of me being ignored and walking away frustrated with fruity 80's music in the background. So I wandered down to pharmacy, only to find that no such thing existed in pharmacy. Those damned assholes.

Once I got out of that hell hole, my next mission was to find a deshedding tool for the furry kids. Poster sheds like a sonofabitch and regular brushes just don't cut it because he gets knotty and matted with his long ridiculous fur.  The only ones I could find were $40!!!!! These things are seriously no bigger than a Bic razor.  I searched EVERYWHERE for this thing and couldn't find one for under $25 bucks, so I ultimately ended up buying one of Ebay for $10.  I also bought 16" brown and blond extensions that I should be getting at the beginning of March.  I'm excited.  My hair has grown 4 inches since October since I started taking Biotin for hair and nail growth.  Anyone trying to grow their hair out, I would HIGHLY recommend taking it.

Well I'm out, 'til next time:)  While your waiting, check out these websites I love:

One of my babies, Poster Nutbag.